Fighting GOD’s Way

True confession, when faced with conflict, are you an avoider or an aggressor?

Relationships are challenging. Human beings tend not to always agree with each other about everything. As a result, we disappoint, demand too much, and hurt each other’s feelings. The more intimate the relationship, the deeper the hurts can be.

Whether at work, school, church, in our homes, or neighborhoods etc., wherever there’s human interaction, the likelihood for conflict exists.

Christians are not exempt from conflict.

Except that, where the world may choose to turn a conflict into a prolonged and bitter battle that leaves permanent scars and division, the children of GOD are to do the opposite. We are to fight with a goal to quickly and lovingly reconcile.

Our disagreements must be handled with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:2-3.

We are one body in one Spirit and we have one Father. We are GOD’s family! (Ephesians 4:4-5). Our heavenly Father knows it’s natural for us to fight and disagree, as long as we do it His way!

We have the OK from GOD to be angry, but with a warning (Ephesians 4:26)

Sin enters into our conflict when one or both parties decide to adopt an unforgiving spirit and act only to injure, to “get back at” the person they are in conflict with. Such actions disobey GOD’s command.

It is sin to seek only to satisfy our own perceived hurt instead of coming together to reconcile and repair the relationship.

 “Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives.” Galatians 5: 24-25

Christians live by the fruit of the Spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5: 22-23) If we belong to the Father we belong to His Son, and in Him we have the power to live this out successfully.

Six FIGHTing principles based on scripture

Some years ago, I learned six easy-to-apply principles for effective conflict resolution, all of which are based on Scripture. Romans 12:16-21; Ephesians 4:4-7, 25-26, 29, 31-32; 1 Corinthians 13:4-7; Proverbs 10:19, 15:1-4.

These principles are taught as an acrostic, letters that spell out the word “FIGHTS”, for easy memorization and application:

1. Face the other person – don’t turn away or allow the other person to turn away. Address the problem as soon as possible, avoid the “silent treatment,” and admit where you are at fault quickly and completely.
2. Ignore the temptation to get side-tracked by topics that are not relevant to the issue at hand.
3. Guard your tongue – be careful not to say anything you would later regret saying; avoid name-calling.
4. History belongs in the past; don’t bring old issues into the current situation.
5. Touch the other person; some physical contact shows that both people are on the same side or team and not against one another.
6. Stay and finish the fight to each other’s satisfaction; do not walk away and leave anything on the table unresolved.

Christians can get angry, fight, and disagree, but we must strive for peaceful resolution, sooner rather than later!

GOD sought to reconcile with us while we were still in conflict with Him. He sent His one begotten Son to die on the cross, unite us in relationship with Him and bring us peace.

Forgiveness and loving reconciliation are GOD’s way to end fights.

Prayer and Thanksgiving: Holy Father, we honor and glorify your holy Name! Thank you for YOUR WORD and YOUR Spirit that guides us in what is right and what pleases YOU; to seek peace and pursue peace; to lovingly forgive and be examples of godliness to the rest of the world by our words, our attitude, our care for each other, our faith, and our integrity. Teach us not to be wise in our own eyes but to remember that our Father in Heaven IS wisdom without measure to whom all dominion and power belong for ever and ever. We pray and ask all things in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Always by God’s Word and prayer,

Cecile

You're Never Alone in the Storms of Life

Have you ever been in the midst of a life struggle where everything seems to be outside of your control and you can see no way out of your situation?

You’ve maybe been in a violent storm or hurricane or seen images of the devastation left behind after such a disaster and you think, that’s what my life feels like right now! I’m going to be destroyed!

You have thoughts you never thought you could as a child of GOD: Where is GOD? Does He really care? Why isn’t He helping me?

You feel singled out, persecuted and abandoned.

You’ve lost your spiritual focus and are making judgments about your situation that can never be true for a child of GOD.

Unfortunately, life can be like that for us sometimes and when it is fear can take over and our faith is challenged.

But take heart! You’re not the first, nor will you be the last, to act in disbelief.

The following events recounted in Luke’s gospel offer some hope.

One day Jesus said to his disciples, “Let’s cross to the other side of the lake.” So they got into a boat and started out. As they sailed across, Jesus settled down for a nap. But soon a fierce storm came down on the lake. The boat was filling with water, and they were in real danger. The disciples went and woke him up, shouting, “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!” When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and the raging waves. Suddenly the storm stopped and all was calm. Then he asked them, “Where is your faith?” The disciples were terrified and amazed. “Who is this man?” they asked each other. “When he gives a command, even the wind and waves obey him!” Luke 8:22-25

In this biblical account JESUS gave a command, and He’s specific, “Let’s cross to the other side of the lake.”  He followed that command by getting into the boat and then settled down for a nap. JESUS was that confident in the outcome of that trip across the lake.

But then the storm comes and the disciples did what we do when our own situations appear to be going off an expected course – they panicked! “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!” But we see that the disciples’ fears are unwarranted. 

JESUS awakens and first, He calms the storm to reassure them of their safety, then He rebukes them for their lack of faith, “Where is your faith?”

So like JESUS to offer care and protection before judgement in the face of our lack of faith!

What can we learn today from this story?

Ask yourself, would you have acted differently from the disciples? The honest answer is probably, no! 

None of us can judge these men, but we are all blessed to be on this side of the story where we can learn and be encouraged by their experience.

We too lose faith when we see our situations as the most dismal it could be with no relief in sight. It may seem to us as well that JESUS is both asleep and uncaring and we forget everything we know about GOD's goodness.

• We forget the promises of GOD to see us through our trouble and not abandon us: “Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the LORD your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you." Joshua 1:9

• We forget that we are the beloved of GOD: “Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won't he also give us everything else?” Romans 8:32 

• We forget that we can trust GOD with all our lives – past, present and future: But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

• We forget that the way we silence our fears is to bring them to CHRIST, lay them at His feet and leave them there. (Matthew 11:28-29).

“Who is this Man?”

In their moment of terror, the disciples called JESUS “Master.”  JESUS is Master to all that claim His Name. 

You too can call on Him with a sincere and fervent faith and be assured that He is able to calm the storms of your life. “When he gives a command, even the wind and waves obey him!” Luke 8:25

You need not be afraid, no matter how stormy the seas of life become, how dark the skies or how loud the winds may howl about you. JESUS will honor your faith in Him. You will not perish if you wait in faith, no matter how long the wait!

You will get to the other side of your stormy lake because JESUS says that’s where you’ll are going – you and He together.

Meanwhile, believe JESUS just as He told Jairus to (Luke 8:40-53). 

If you believe, you will have peace in your present circumstances and a living hope for the future when you will look upon His face with awe and reverence and know the answer to – “Who is this Man?”

Prayer and Thanksgiving: Holy GOD and Father, forgive us for all the times we’ve had little faith. Thank you for reminding us that fear and anxiety are wasted emotions because YOU are always with us in our trouble and will never fail us. Remind us also that our lives reflect YOUR glory so when we remain steadfast and endure trials with faith the world will see YOUR power, YOUR goodness and YOUR love through us. Thank YOU for YOUR WORD that became flesh and is living among us and in us, JESUS CHRIST, our LORD and MASTER. It is in HIS NAME we pray. Amen!

Always by God’s Word and prayer,

Cecile

When We Need Comfort

Life is full of letdowns, betrayals, disappointments, hurts, pains, and losses but if you are a child of GOD, you are never alone in your trouble. Your hope is in your Heavenly Father.

The LORD provides what we need

Our Heavenly Farther knows when we are hurting and that we need reassurance and comfort.

In 2 Corinthians 1: 3 -4 we read, “GOD is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others.”

Whether through prayer, reading of His WORD or through His family – the body of CHRIST, GOD is the “source of ALL comfort.” Through our relationship with GOD and each other we get help in our times of distress.

Scripture also instructs us to encourage each other and build each other up (1 Thessalonians 5:11). We are told that those who are strong have an obligation to bear the weaknesses of those without strength… (Romans 15:1).

To receive help we must let others into our space of need. We must never be ashamed or too prideful to ask for and accept comfort when we need it. Neither should we neglect to offer it to others.

We disobey GOD’s law if we are guilty of either act.

“Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of CHRIST.” Galatians 6:2

The LORD makes us responsible for each other

If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging… Romans 12:8.

A few encouraging words spoken at the right time can lift a broken spirit, influence someone to do better or try harder, or not give up on something that seems impossible for them at the time.

Call; send a text, or e-mail, or a note; take a meal and stay and share it.

We also pray with the hurting. We pray with sincerity and passion; we ask the Holy Spirit of all truth to guide our minds and thoughts as we pray.

We don’t have to know every detail of someone’s pain. GOD knows all. He asks only that we care about the plight of others as we do our own.

Conclusion

Whether we are the hurting or one providing comfort, we depend solely on GOD’s provision and His love, never on our own strength. We put our trust in Him, who is all our source and all our hope.

We let our obedience affirm His promises.

My salvation and glory depend on God, my strong rock. My refuge is in God.

Prayer and Thanksgiving: Holy Father and our GOD! YOU invite us to cast our burdens and cares on YOU. Thank YOU for the promises in YOUR WORD that never fail. YOU strengthen weak knees and lift up arms that hang down. YOU are our strong rock and a refuge. All dominion and power belong to you for ever and ever. We pray and ask all things in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Always by God’s Word and prayer,

Cecile

How Christians Grieve

Grief almost always follows loss.

We grieve the loss of relationships, jobs, physical ability, social status, and, most commonly, the death of loved ones.

Nothing in life truly prepares us for the death of a loved one. Having recently lost someone, I know what it’s like to be overwhelmed by grief.

No matter how long we live or how many times we experience it, death will shake us. But Christians serve a wise and loving GOD who always provides a path to wholeness.

In times of loss we find our healing through an emotion that GOD gives to all of us. We call it grief.

When our grief is in perspective to GOD’s will it can be productive; when it isn’t, grief can destroy us.

How do we grieve GOD’s way?

GOD allows us our grief for a purpose, but grief also has its limit.

We get into trouble when we become isolated in our grief and lose hope. Grief then can become an unhealthy and destructive emotion.

Our grief serves to remind us that life as we know it here on earth is going to end. It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, since that is the end of all mankind, and the living should take it to heart. Ecclesiastes 7:2

Some of us need more time than others to work through our grief but for all of us our time of mourning is temporary and must come to an end. Weeping may spend the night, but there is joy in the morning. Psalm 30:5

GOD’s WORD must be the anchor for grieving souls. The Psalms, especially, are there to remind us of GOD’s faithfulness to the sorrowful:

• Even when I go through the darkest valley, ..You are with me; Your rod and Your staff—they comfort me. Psalm 23:4
• God is our refuge and strength, a helper who is always found in times of trouble. Be still and know that I am GOD Psalm 46:1, 10
• You Yourself have recorded my wanderings. Put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your records? Psalm 56:8
• He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3
• My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart, my portion forever. Psalm 73:26
• Be gracious to me, Lord, because I am in distress; my eyes are worn out from angry sorrow—my whole being as well. Psalm 31:9-10
• Why am I so depressed? Why this turmoil within me? Put your hope in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God. Psalm 42:5

These are but a few of the many verses we can meditate on and use for prayer and petition to GOD who cannot help but respond with comfort and healing.

As we lean on GOD, we also lean on those that He has placed in our lives – members of the body of CHRIST who are able to comfort us as they too have received comfort in the past. (2 Corinthians 1:4.)

We are called to bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2) and to grieve with those who grieve (Romans 12:15.) But the grieving must be honest with our emotions and open to accepting all that 

GOD has provided for a healthy life in Himself and through the Church body.

We do not pretend that grief isn’t hard, because it is!

Grief is hard on the grieving and on those who are there for support. But when all obey GOD’s will, all will overcome.

We cast our burdens on Him, rely on His WORD and the body of CHRIST, and soon we will be healed and have peace that is beyond all understanding (Philippians 4:6-7).

He will destroy death forever. The Lord God will wipe away the tears from every face…Isaiah 25:8

Prayer and Thanksgiving: Holy Father, YOU are the GOD of all comfort whom we seek in our greatest sorrow. Thank YOU that YOU so love us and we can cast all our anxieties and pain on YOU. Thank YOU for YOUR WORD that gives us hope and peace in our distress and the faithful of the flock that YOU put in place to stand alongside us. Thank YOU for JESUS who weeps for us and always lives to make intercession for us when we are in great agony and unable to utter a word for ourselves. We adore YOU, Abba and JESUS, our Savior. YOU always provide all that we need. To YOU, we give all praise, all honor and all glory, and we ask all things in JESUS’ Holy NAME. Amen.

Always by God’s Word and prayer,

Cecile