Friends – Part 2

There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship. Thomas Aquinas

As children of GOD, we ought to strive to be the kind of a friend we think we deserve to have – reliable and authentic; without falsehood, hypocrisy, or guile; one who always has a another’s best and truest interest at heart, and will seek after their good, even at our own expense.

We all know that JESUS is such a friend but the Scriptures tell us of others just like ourselves, mere mortals, who were genuine and selfless friends – the kind that sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24b

 The kind of friend we want - Jonathan

One of the most famous stories about friendship in the Bible is told in 1 Samuel 18-20 – it’s the story of Jonathan and David.

David was the second king to rule over ancient Israel, after King Saul. GOD took away the kingdom from Saul and chose David to replace him as king of Israel because Saul disobeyed GOD.

Saul’s son Jonathan was David friend. The two young men formed a special bond of friendship from their first meeting. The Scriptures tells us that Jonathan loved David as his own soul and made a covenant of friendship with him. (1 Samuel 18:1-3).

But for Saul’s transgression against the LORD, Jonathan, as a rightful heir, ought to have been Saul’s successor. Even though Jonathan knew that David would be the next king, he did not let that fact change their friendship. Instead Jonathan trusted God’s decision, accepted it with grace and continued to show genuine goodwill towards David.

Jonathan not only yielded to GOD’s will but protected David from his father who, in a jealous rage, was determined to kill David.

“My father Saul is looking for a chance to kill you. Be on your guard tomorrow morning; go into hiding and stay there. I will go out and stand with my father in the field where you are. I’ll speak to him about you and will tell you what I find out.” Jonathan spoke well of David to Saul his father and said to him, “Let not the king sin against his servant David, because he has not sinned against you, and because his deeds have brought good to you. 1 Samuel 19:2-4

Saul’s hatred and fear of David was so intense that Jonathan couldn’t trust him not to harm his friend, although Saul denied that he would. When Jonathan finally confronted Saul with the truth, Saul turned his anger toward Jonathan, called him a traitor and tried to kill his own son.

Jonathan put his relationship with his father at risk, as well as his own life, to save his friend. He was never jealous of David’s position and his affection continued to be genuine. David came to rely on Jonathan's protection from Saul's wrath.

“….if my father intends to harm you, may the Lord deal with Jonathan, be it ever so severely, if I do not let you know and send you away in peace. May the Lord be with you as he has been with my father.” 1 Samuel 20:13

Eventually, out of necessity, David and Jonathan parted. Later, when David learned of Jonathan’s death on the battlefield he was heartbroken and wrote a beautiful tribute to honor his friend.

Human sympathy is sweet, but it is necessarily an imperfect thing. Sympathy, whether with sorrow or temptation, in order to be perfect, must proceed from One who has infinite power of sympathizing, and infinite good will to exercise it. George W. Mylne

  

The One perfect Friend – JESUS

By GOD’s grace and His Spirit that lives within us, we strive to be the best friend we can be and to choose our friends wisely. But, we are imperfect creatures who make mistakes so our perfect LORD has provided a way out for us – forgiveness and reconciliation.

To be a friend and keep our friends we must be willing to forgive continually, receive forgiveness and be reconciled.

“Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18:21-22

“If your brother or sister[a] sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.” Luke 17:3-4

How well we live and serve our Father has a lot to do with the quality of support we have and give. The right kind of friends keep each other anchored and true to self, purpose and GOD.

Friendship, says C.S. Lewis, is one of those things that give value to survival.

Friends make our lives better.

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

Prayer and Thanksgiving: Holy GOD, our Father in Heaven. YOUR WORD says that if we listen to advice and accept discipline, at the end we will be counted among the wise. Father we are listening and we are learning how YOU desire us to live. As we go through this journey we ask that YOU continue to give us wisdom to both be a friend and choose the right friends. We thank YOU for being our best and truest friend who forgives us so much and because of YOUR grace and mercy we can extend grace and mercy, for the same reason YOU do, to keep our friends close, to be the kind of friend that brings honor and glory to YOUR NAME. We praise YOU, Father, and give honor to JESUS CHRIST, our Redeemer and Friend! In WHOSE NAME we pray.  Amen!

Always by God’s Word and prayer,

Cecile

Friends – Part 1

Scripture tells us that the righteous must choose their friends carefully so we are not led astray by bad company whose negative influences will hurt us, tarnish our character and ruin our testimony before the world. (Proverbs 12:26; 1 Corinthians 15:33)

We can find examples of both good and bad friends in the Scriptures where everything that was written, was written to teach and encourage us.  

One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin…Proverbs 18:24a

The kind of friend we avoid - Jonadab

2 Samuel 13 recounts the story of Amnon, one of King David’s sons, whose obsession with his half-sister, Tamar was so toxic as to affect both his mood and his appeearance. Amnon’s friend and adviser Jonadab, on learning the reason for Amnon’s melancholy, encouraged Amnon in a plan of deception, the consequences of which were severe for both Tamar and Amnon, and, in the long run, King David himself.

Amnon was to take to his bed under the pretense of illness and when the King came to visit request that Tamar be sent to his home to cook a special meal for him. The plot was to get Tamar to Amnon’s private quarters so he could be alone with her; and King David unknowingly agreed to a plan that would cause harm to his daughter.

Despite her protests Amnon forced himself on his sister and raped her. Then, instead of doing the right thing and ask his father to marry her, he threw her out of his house, thus she was condemned to live out the rest of her life a “shamed woman” – hidden away in the home of her biological brother Absalom. In the culture of that day, Tamar was now unmarriageable material, damaged goods who would never enjoy a family of her own.

Absalom knew what Amnon had done but he waited two years to take his revenge. Absalom tricked their father David into sending Amnon along with other brothers to, supposedly, help out with Absalom’s sheep shearing. Having enticed Amnon far away from the King, Absalom ordered his servants to murder Amnon; and then Absalom ran to another city.  

When David learned of Amnon’s murder he was angry as well as grieved for the murder of Amnon at his brother’s hand and became estranged from Absalom.

The result of all the original lies and deceptions culminated in Absalom’s own death on the battlefield. He developed such bitterness toward David that he attempted to take over the rule of Israel and his father’s throne and was himself murdered by one of David’s soldiers.

All this because Amnon was a weak man who accepted bad counsel from a friend and adviser.

But the story also told us something crucial about Jonadab’s character that marked him as a very bad friend – “And Jonadab was a very crafty man.” 2 Samuel 13:3

The dictionary defines a “crafty” person as one who is “clever at achieving one's aims by indirect or deceitful methods” and synonyms include, cunning, guileful, wily, artful, devious, sly, tricky, duplicitous, dishonest, underhand, cheating, deceitful, scheming, calculating, designing, evasive.

  

JESUS is a believer’s truest and best friend. How do these characteristics compare with what we know of Him?

Isaiah 53:9 tells us that there wasn’t any deceit in JESUS’s mouth. No falsehoods, no hypocrisy, no guile, no ambiguity, no duplicity, no evasiveness, nothing calculating, nothing designed to perpetrate a dishonest deed.  JESUS spoke only TRUTH!

We need friends like JESUS! Who will help us in our weakness to bear our burdens, rather than add to them!

Never do a wrong thing to make a friend or to keep one. Robert E. Lee

To be continued….

Prayer and Thanksgiving: Holy GOD and Father in Heaven. We thank YOU for YOUR WORD that teaches, instructs, and corrects. We thank YOU for what we are learning about true friendship. Father, YOU have given us also a perfect example of a true friend in our LORD and SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST.  Above all, JESUS was without guile in HIS walk before YOU and your children ought to be the same so we learn to be without guile with each other. Help us to build and choose friendships built on truth and not deception and lies.  Search us and see if there is anything that is not real, or honest, or transparent in us and, by YOUR grace, root up all that is toxic and hateful, all hypocrisy, bad motives, and unholy thought that is not like JESUS, and replace it with that which will serve to nurture a friendship that will bring YOU honor and glory. We praise YOU, Father, and give honor to YOUR SON; our Redeemer and Friend! In HIS NAME we pray.  Amen!

Always by God’s Word and prayer,

Cecile